TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN....

Dear Civilians:

We know that the current state of affairs in our great
nation has many civilians up in arms and excited to join
the military. For those of you who can't join, you can
still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas with
which we would like your assistance:


1). The next time you see an adult talking during the playing of
the National anthem . . . kick his ass.

2).When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag (or
any flag for that matter) in protest . . . kick his ass.

3). Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the
highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone
doing otherwise, quietly pull him aside and explain how these
Veterans fought for the very freedom he basks in every second.
Enlighten him on the many sacrifices these Veterans made to
make this Nation great. Then hold him down while the
Veteran kicks his ass.

4). If you are not in the military, DO NOT pretend that you are.
Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU's), telling others that you
used to be "Special Forces," and collecting GI Joe memorabilia
might have been okay if you were still seven, but now it will
only get your ass kicked. (Veterans are exempt from this rule.)

5). If you witness someone calling an enlisted Marine "Sir," stand
back. A Marine will kick his ass.

6). Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask him
"Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such
ignorance deserves an ass kicking. (Children are exempt.)

7). Roseanne Barr's singing of the National Anthem was not a
blooper . . it was a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner
or later your ass will be kicked.

8).Next time Old Glory prances by during a parade, get on your damn
feet and pay homage to her by taking off your friggin' hat,
placing your hand over your heart and quietly thanking the
military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her . . .
of course, failure to do any of these will earn you a severe
ass kicking.

9)."Your Mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me . . . stop
saying it! If she did, she would most likely kick your ass!

10). Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying
"Let's go kill those Commies!!!" And stop asking us where he is!!!!
Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military.
That reminds me . . .if you see anyone calling those damn psychic
phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick their ass.

11). Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the
military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving
and Christmas that you enjoy with family and friends, please
remember that there are, literally, thousands of troops overseas
wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our
military members and the sacrifices they make every day.
Without them, our country would get its ass kicked

C.J. Troyer
Lynchburg, SC 29080

I HAVE TRIED AND TRIED TO PUT A COMMENT SECTION ON THIS BLOG....AND IT IS NOT WORKING!!! I FUCKING GIVE UP!!!

I THINK I MAY BE TOO TENDER HEARTED

I have always been a tender hearted person. I get hurt easily. I have been that way since I was a child. My friends would come over and when it was time for hem to go home, I would cry.
That same tender heart still beats in my chest today. I cry so easily, too easily I think sometimes.
I was driving home from work the other night about 12am and I hit a dog. It was a large dog. I think someone had hit it before me and had wounded it. I was on it before I could slow down or swerve. It was lying on its side with its back to me. Just before I hit it, it looked over its shoulder at my oncoming car. The I hit it hard. It broke some fiber glass thing on the front underside of the car. It made the steering wheel jerk in my hand. I killed it. It was a golden retreiver. I had to pull the car over to the side of the road and cry. I was crying so hard I couldn't hardly get my breath. It was 30 minutes before I could creep on down the road towards home. I cried off and on for the 1.5 hour drive. I could still feel the jerk of the steering wheel in my hands long after I got out of the car. That happened over a week ago and the image of that poor animal looking over its shoulder at my car still haunts me. I am crying now as I type this in.
I cry when I hear sad songs of love. Especially if I hear a song that says what I really feel in my heart towards Jefferson. Lately, whenever I hear anything that reminds me of him, I break down and cry. I miss him soo much. I have had many relationships, but I can say in all honesty that I have never been in love before I met him. He told me he loves me too, but I know he loves the idea of being free more.
I cry at sad movies. I don't even try to hide the fact that something has touched me so deeply as to move me to tears. I just let the tears stream down my face and carry tissue. There have been commercials that I have just cried like a baby over. I know, too tender hearted.

There is a group of guys who post on a message board. They are cruel and unfeeling. I have shed quite a few tears over their callous words and cutting comments to me. I tried to play along and pretend that it didn't hurt me. But it did. I have been the but end of their jokes so many times I lost count. They have ridiculed my weight problem. Posted pics of me, making nasty comments about me and Jefferson. I never cared what they looked like. It wasn't important. I was there for their words and ideas, not to see who looked ugly and who was good looking. They ran out of witty things to say to me, and resorted to name calling and embarrassing proclamations of how ugly I am. These are supposedly grown men too. I am sure some of them may come and read this and snicker and say.."Ha! We beat that ugly fat bitch down!" Well, I am not made of wood. I am a girl, with tender feelings. Oh, it was fun to play around and say smart assed remarks, but I am tired of fighting with grown men who act like spoiled little boys. So, I have decided to discontinue posting there. I am going to miss it a lot. I really did enjoy it when noone was being cruel. I could take it when they were just attacking me mentally. I just can't keep going back for more attacks on my looks, which shouldn't have been important at all to begin with.
I have always had a weight problem, and have struggled for years to lose. My weight has fluctuated. I was depressed for many years and put on weight. I never have had a good self esteem. People always think I am so strong, but I feel scared inside.
Yet, somehow I have always been able to make friends easily, and for some crazy reason, men like me. Hell if I know why, but they do.
I worry a lot also. I worry that I may have said something to someone that offended them and made them feel bad about themselves. I have always strived to be an edifyer. I try to help anyone who asks me for help. I have opened my home to homeless people. There is a homeless teenager living with me now. Her mother doesn't want her. I cannot imagine what that must feel like.
I suppose being tender hearted is a good thing. However, people tend to take advantage of you and use you. You don't mean to let it happen, but sometimes it does anyway.
I know this has been a somewhat emotional entry tonight or this morning, however you want to look at it. It is fitting though, because I am an emotional woman. I am forgiving also. I can extend the hand of friendship to those who have tried their best to reduce me to an ugly fat blob. Why? Cause I have an understanding, forgiving heart.
Mainly though cause they are just a bunch of cold dicks.....

MY SICK SENSE OF HUMOR

I have always had a somewhat morbid sense of humor. Things most people find disgusting and gross, I will just crack up about. I discovered early on it wasn't normal for a girl to laugh at blood and guts in a humorous setting. I can't help myself though. Now tht I am a nurse, that problem is compounded. Nurses are known for having sick senses of humor anyway. It helps us cope with the stress of human infirmities. But, I can't totaly blame mine on being a nurse. I was this way long before I got licensed.
However, if you are like me, then you will enjoy these little cartoons I am about to share with you. If not, then please forgive me for being the sick puppy that I am.

http://www.joecartoon.com/pages/home/
in particular this one:
http://www.joecartoon.com/pages/livenletdive/
it will take a few to load....but if you like off beat humor, then just be patient.
Http://www.killfrog.com/
http://www.killfrog.com/02/superpimpmx.html

Hope you enjoy!!!

SECOND DATE WITH THE ARMY DUDE

Ok, remember the army dude I picked up while I was in Savannah? Well, he called me up and asked me out again. He is still in Savannah and I was back home. After much discussion it was determined it would be better if I went there since I know that area better than he does.
I got in Savannah around 6:30pm. Called him and told him I was there. He met me at the Olive Garden and we had dinner together.
He really is a cool guy. I found out he is something like the equivalent to the FBI, but the army version. He is kinda quiet. His laugh is quiet, his voice is quiet, kinda soothing. His movement are slow and deliberate. Like he is too cool to get into a hurry. There is no fidgeting. No playing with his silverware or drumming his fingers. When I am talking to him, he leans towards me, looks me straight in the face and just sucks in every word as they roll off my lips. When he does speak though it is usually worth hearing.
I on the other hand am a Flippity Gibbet. I am loud and colorful and giggly. I use my hands when I talk and add little things to my conversation, like over exaggerated facial expressions and impersonations. Waitresses usually like to hang around my table talking longer than necessary. I never meet a stranger, and I generally like everyone. Most of the guys I have dated, have been stupified by how everyone that meets me loves me, men and women alike.
So here we were sitting there like James Bond and Margret Cho, having a great conversation. He starts to loosen up and tells me about his childhood. I am sitting there looking at him, wondering what in the world he sees in me, when all of a sudden he grabs my hand and says, "You are the most open, truthful person I have met in a long time. I love to talk to you".
Oh My God! I just melted. "Why thank you", I say smiling from ear to ear. "I enjoy talking to you too", I say.
"No, seriously, you can talk about anything and make it fun. I wish I had met you along time ago", he adds.
"Wow, that was a sweet thing to say", I said..more melting...
So this goes on for a few more minutes. He asks if I want to go get a drink or something and I say of course. So, we go to a little club on DeRenne Ave. As luck would have it, they were having karaoke.....oh yeah!! After I downed a few bourbon and cokes, I announced I was going to sing. He was all in favor of that. Not for him though, he wanted to hear me sing. So, I got the book of songs and made my selections, three in all.
1. It's Your Love, by Tim Mcgraw
2. Lean On Me, by Bill Whithers
3.Spiders and Snakes, (can't remember singer)
I didn't tell him what I was going to be singing. I got up there kinda nervous to start with, but as soon as I started singing I calmed down. People got up and slow danced during the song. I felt very pleased with myself. When I got finished and came back to the table, he just sat there a little while smiling at me. I blushed, and said.."Whattttttt?". He told me that was the biggest turn on, seeing me singing. More melting...
By the time it was my turn again to sing, I had drank a couple more bourbon and cokes. So when I started laying the soul on thick and heavy while singing Lean On Me, people were yelling."Sang it girl!!!", which made me embellish the words even more.
Again he was so complimentary. I wanted to attack him on the spot.
By the time my last song came up I was more than tipsy, I was drunk. Now, I don't know if anyone has ever heard of the song Spiders and Snakes, but it is a fun song about a boy who likes to use spiders and snakes to impress his girlfriends. I had the best time doing that!! he just laughed and said that was great when I got back to our table again. He still hadn't asked me to dance the whole night, and I was beginning to think he wasn't going to. But he did.
He led me out on the dance floor and drew me into his arms, holding me tight. I nestled in close to him and inhaled his cologne as we swayed to the music. I sighed out loud and he chuckled, titled my chin back with his finger and kissed me softly while we continued to dance. The music stopped and we continued to kiss. We kissed right on through to the next song and started dancing again. That was so satisfying and romantic. He is about 6'3 and I am 5'6, I love to kiss tall men.
The rest of the evening we talked and danced, I slowed down on the bourbon and coke, cause I was getting too drunk. I went back to his place for the night.
It was a wonderful date, and I look forward to doing it again.
I want to interject something here. I confess that the whole time I was with 'James Bond', I was wishing it was Jefferson. I am still in love with him. I can't wait for him to come home. I miss him very much. Things are getting better between us, so who knows.......

COLIN POWELL ROCKS!!

I have been a long time admirer of Colin Powell. I have oftentimes wished he would run for president. He has been asked publicly to run, but always declines. He knows the US is still to bigoty to vote a black man into office. However, I am sure it warms his heart to know there are those who would love to see him in the White House.
Here is an example of his classy ass self handling a sarcastic remark made the Archbishop of Canterbury no less:
When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by
the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example of
empire building by George Bush.

He answered by saying that, "Over the years, the United States has sent
many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom
beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return
is enough to bury those that did not return."

It became very quiet in the room.

God, I love that man.

OH MY GOD!!!! I AM LOSING MY MIND AND I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.
YESTERDAY WAS AS VOID AS TODAY, AND I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.
I DON'T WANT TO BE THIS WAY, I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO GO OR WHAT TO SAY.
I JUST DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY.
SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

When you don't know what to do with yourself, Walk around looking worried. ~Electronic Fortune Teller

I took my daughter to the movies tonight. We saw 'How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days'. It was an excellent movie, and there was plenty of male and female eye candy. I also bought her a new outfit and took her out for pizza.

She is coming back home soon, and I am looking forward to it. My Grandmother is practically begging me to take her. It has been a long row to hoe but I have stuck to my guns and now I am about to win.

I will tell the story in another entry. I am tired, my ankles are swollen and I have PMS, so I am going to go to bed.

"Good Night Mrs. Kallahbash, whereever you are." ~ Jimmy Durante

MY ONE AND ONLY POST THAT IS IN ANYWAY POLITICAL

I am going to post something that may or may not offend people. I hope it doesn't, but if it does, just please realize that I am a good person at heart and never wish to cause harm or pain to another soul.

"Going to war without France is like going duck hunting without your accordion."

~ Donald Rumsfeld, U.S. Secretary of Defense

As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure." Jacques Chirac,
~ President of France

"As far as France is concerned, you're right." Rush Limbaugh

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."

~ Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot. Dropped once.'"

Rep. Roy Blunt (MO)


"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found truffles in Iraq."

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the Nazis?"

~ Dennis Miller

Raise your right hand if you like the French...

Raise both hands if you are French.


"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates Americans, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people."

~ Conan O'Brien


"I don't know why people are surprised the French don't want to help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France."

~ Jay Leno


Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII?

A. Table for 100,000 m'sieur?



"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."

~ David Letterman

Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris? It's not known, it's never been tried."

~ Rep. R. Blount (MO)


"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII? And that's because it was raining."

~ John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.


It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us."

~ Alan Kent